Top Five Ways To Use Your Extra Kidney

Like it or not, Reality TV Shows seem to behave happened before. A member of the British
everywhere. Unless you are a TV pariah you willmilitary was sent the smuggled kidney of an
have no doubt experienced the joys of such showsexecuted Chinese prisoner as a birthday prank. He did
as "Big Brother", "There's Something about Miriam",the only reasonable thing: marinated it in a cream
"Lapdance Island" and "Space Cadets".bechamel sauce with a tomato paste. By all accounts
The latest addition to this list of mind boggling realityit was delicious.
shows is BNN's "The Big Donor Show" to be aired onUse it as a dowry. If you simply can't get rid of a
Friday the 1st of June for Dutch viewers. The 80troublesome daughter then your extra kidney could
minute show invites viewers to send in their advicebe your saviour. An increasingly common practice in
and opinions to help a critically ill woman choose thesouth and west India is to sell off a kidney in order
best possible recipient of her kidney from among 3to pass on your daughter. According to medical
contenders.anthropologist Lawrence Cohen, parents can no
Though the show's concept has been ridiculed andlonger complain about being unable to raise a dowry.
declared unethical by many political parties, kidney"Haven't you got a spare kidney?"
specialists and donor authorities, BNN's chairman isMake kidney stones. A handy way to avoid months
protecting the show and its concept, saying: "Theof agonising post-op pain and a lifetime of single
chance for a kidney for the contestants is 33%. Thiskidney-dom is to keep your kidneys in their rightful
is much higher than that for people on a waiting list".place and turn your attentions to growing kidney
This is all in very poor taste, but this being the leaststones. All you have to do is pee them out and sell
of our concerns, we've come up with our top fivethem on. One of William Shatner's stones recently
things to do with your spare kidney. After all,sold for a mammoth $25,000. Nice work if you can
everyone's got one.get it.
Top five ways to use your extra kidneyTransplant it. Probably the only legal method to get
Sell it. The black market trade in organs, especiallyrid of an unwanted kidney is simply, give it to
kidneys, is burgeoning. Dodgy backstreet doctors willsomeone else. Preferably someone who's going to
relieve you of your spare organ for a tasty wad ofuse it as a kidney and not as an ornamental paper
cash, but be careful about where you go. It's muchweight.
better to use the organ pirates of Brazil, where youJust to make it clear before any of you rush off to
could earn up to $10,000, than the bandits ofyour local backstreet butcher to start making your
Baghdad who'll only offer a meagre $1,400.organs pay please, please, please don't. Having a
Eat it. You're carrying around your very own mainkidney removed will really hurt. A lot. And you'll spend
course and you won't even put on any weight bythe rest of your life in fear that your one remaining
eating it. We can only find one reported instance of akidney will die of loneliness, leaving you right up the
man eating a human kidney, although it's bound toLoop of Henle.